Knock Me Out


…And it’s the only hope I have today. I am just so tired! Insomnia has struck again. You couldn’t pay me enough to show my face in public in this current state. I feel like a zombie and pretty sure I look like one too. There is nothing like looking in the mirror first thing in the morning after no sleep, to make one wonder why anyone wants to date her??

My daughter is still home sick from school today, and I am dreading the, “mommy I’m hungry,” request when she wakes up. I pretty much only make cereal for breakfast, so it really shouldn’t be a deep fear this morning…but it is.  That is how tired I am . Cereal is just too much effort.

If I were smart I would have gone right back to bed after bringing the other children to school. Sometimes I’m not smart. It is the age old dilemma though, right? Do I get some rest while a child is sleeping? Enjoy the quiet and a cup of tea? Get some work done? Laundry? Dishes? (too noisy – might wake the sleeping angel who will then want breakfast) In the end, after much deliberation, panic, and confusion, we usually have run out of time and life goes on with the children now awake.

I have little to complain about since mine are much older now, with the youngest being nine. The teenagers sleep so long, I often sneak in to watch their chests go up and down, for proof they are breathing. Not joking.

I can hear some of you saying, “If her youngest is nine, why isn’t she getting her own fancy, cereal breakfast?” A valid point, but let me explain. She is the baby in a family of six children. Her oldest sibling is 24 years old. She is adored at every turn. Lucky girl, and we are in no hurry for her to get her own Lucky Charms. But I digress – back to tired old me…

When insomnia hits, there isn’t a thing I can do. Nothing helps. I often joke with friends, asking them to come hit me in the head with a frying pan so I can sleep. They have yet to do it – I think this may be a good sign of kind friends.

I am not a morning person in the first place. So if I don’t sleep at all, mornings are ridiculously painful. No one would guess this of me. Pretty sure I am viewed as always pleasant and happy. Yeah…not so much in the mornings. I have one child, my 15 year old son, who gets this. He is the same way. We aren’t mean – we just don’t want to talk. When we pass each other in the morning, we say nothing. It is an unspoken respect for each other’s desire to not speak until the cobwebs have cleared. I feel bad for my happy, little morning campers. As soon as they see me, “Hi Mommy! Did you sleep well?” “Umm no I didn’t and why are you so happy?” I of course, don’t say this out loud, but in my mind I am truly asking the question.

My Luke and I – NOT in the morning 😉

So I shall carry on, caffeine in tow all day long, dreaming of pjs and my cozy bed, and praying said bed does its job tonight.  I’ll shower, (please), put on some make up, google how to cover up dark circles under my eyes, and carry on like the warrior mama that I am. To all of the tired mommies out there today – I salute you.

Mama’s girl and lover of Lucky Charms




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